Saturday, August 11, 2012

Unearthly Landing





Here it is.  A landscape I never imagined even in my wildest nightmares as a nurse.

I am old.

Don't we all think we are going to die young?
I did.  I thought I was going to die young.
Didn't die young.
So here I am.  On an unearthly landscape.  And strange as it seems, there are few markers, such little pools  (instead of big oceans) of conversation about what's it's like to "go down", what the ride really is like.
Nobody wants to talk about it!!!

Even the professionals tell you to "think positive"....errr, you know, don't think about it....
or as one nurse said about her age'd patients, "Reality therapy is NOT where it is at!"

But when I am flying in a plane and it is making its dangerous descent, I do not pull the shades and plug my ears into earphones. The way I look at it is this:  I am here for the experience.  I sit by the plane window and watch the descent.  If we crash I am going to also watch that as long as possible.

I do reserve the right to scream.

How I wish I had a blog from either one of my grandma's as they started their descent and struggled around on the unearthly landscape.
Even a blog from my one grandpa who got old would be interesting.
But there is nothing but little snipettes* and snatchets* of memories of unsmiling people who were glad to see me come and relieved to see me go.    (*Now don't go thinking I am demented because I use words that are not in the dictionary.  I have always figured if William Shakespeare could make up new words and add them to the dictionary, so can I .)  Are there any better words than snipettes and snatchets to describe faded memories?  If so, send them to me.

So this blog is for you, if you are interested.  And if you live long enough, something tells me you will be interested.

Track my progress as I descend.  It is the human experience.
In fact my dad used to say, "Riverwatch, for goodness sakes, be nice to people on the way up!  You may need them on the way back down."
Dad didn't bother to tell me I might outlive some  of my friends and need to make new ones when I am old and ugly and grumpy from pain..  No advice from him on that challenge!



Thanks for taking time to visit,
Riverwatch