I've Landed!

Thursday, June 2, 2016

Oh, Doctor, My Doctor!

Cosmetic Surgery

Who is at most risk? The surgeon or the adolescent patient?

My darling granddaughter, Christina, decided to have  breast reduction surgery.

A stunningly beautiful girl, she was TIRED, TIRED TIRED of all the humiliation that is directed at over-endowed females in public.
Nobody encouraged her to have cosmetic surgery except her surgeon, her therapist, and her grandmother Riverwatch the RN.

Being an adolescent 19 years old without money, Chritina's parents did have to buy off on the procedure.
 Doesn't mean they approved.

My theory is that every woman deserves a running chance in public!

The female surgeon's theory is I might as well make the money as some dude surgeon.

Her therapist's theory is no other modality of treatment has worked so let's call this surgery a modality.
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Dr. Wonderful was stunned at how her “mature and intelligent” patient turned into a freak of all freaks post-operatively.

Thank goodness for Smart Phones which can track and reach a falcon on a cloudy day!
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Dr. Wonderful had no place to hide.

When Christina fell on her chest and created nice big hematomas, pictures flew back and forth over the wireless even in the middle of the night. Dr. Wonderful's return pictures were of NORMAL hematomas (there is no such thing) so Christina could compare her hematomas with normal ones and she could see how normal and non-life-threatening were those bulges of blood.

There was so much drama.
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 I was calm. I merely said, with typical lack of nursing sympathy, “Whatever possessed you to double up on your LorTab dose and then repeat it in an hour? No wonder you fell!”

I won't bore you with all the screaming Christina did or all the hard-nosed crap she threw at her world renown cosmetic surgeon.
I felt sorry for the acclaimed woman who took on this case surgically.

But Dr. Wonderful is not renowned for nothing!
When the surgery was all over and pronounced “ excellent outcome” , this surgeon hired my fragile granddaughter!

Dr. Wonderful said to her,  “I want to hire you because you are highly intelligent and already a certified Emergency Medical Tech, and such an interesting patient, and I have only had one other patient like you and I need to have you educate me as to how and why anxiety is released so suddenly and abundantly by the surgical process. 
It will be such helpful education for me to help me with other patients. I will pay you for your time to visit with me for a couple of hours, talking about your feelings and even what your therapist has talked with you about.”
Christina was so enthused with this honor!
She forgot her anger at Dr. Wonderful as she unloaded (for pay) on this savy savy woman who certainly knows how to pull the net around a freako.
Christina willingly and enthusiastically broke her own confidentiality of therapy and let the whole nine yards hang out.
For money, of course.
Paid to educate her world renowned surgeon.

Christina will never sue. The outcome was so good and her anger is all gone.
But should she freak out downstream because milk for her newborn won't come in, or some other oddity crops up, she can never sue Dr. Wonderful.
Oh, she could try to sue.
But Dr. Wonderful has all the 411 on Christina.

It was worth the few bucks and a 2 hour time investment in listening (and recording) .

I had to laugh.

Thanks for cruising by,